Dear reader, thank you for joining me in (finally) starting this new year. I’ve been inhaling knowledge and exhaling words for my thesis and did not want to push myself even more to also update on here as well. That is why it has been a little quieter from my side, but I still loved reading blogposts from others. I hope you had a good start of the year. And if not, no worries. New starts can always be made if you need them. I feel February will be a new start for me as well, since it means the end of another academic semester and the start of a new adventure. And I feel like I need it. A fresh breath of cool winter air. The one that prickles the inside of your lungs.
I feel I’ve been surviving the past few weeks or even months. (And here I just want to put some quick thoughts on the lockdown and what life feels like right now) I constantly feel like I need to adjust. Again and again, to not being able to plan too much ahead, not knowing how the world will look next month. But also the same, because the days start to look like each other due to a lack of change in my routine. I am just getting restless from a constant urge that tells me I should be doing more in a world where nothing can be done. Not really, at least.
I am still getting used to resting these efforts. To enjoy the same routine. Getting comfortable in this phase of life. Now and then I can remind myself to take a breath. To be in the moment. And other times it is overwhelming to stay present in a feeling that is not comfortable. I look up ways to escape: social media, video’s, books… I want to be okay with this as well. Somehow I keep punishing myself for seeking that distraction, for watching useless Sims videos on YouTube, or binge watching Legend of Korra. I wonder if you feel this way too?
In the context of New Year’s, I want to wish you a year. I don’t want to force it to be a happy year. Just a year. A year with no expectations. Just reminding ourselves to breathe in and out. 2020 proved us that we can do it, so in 2021 we’ll know we can handle it.
I also made a few resolutions for this new year and am excited to keep these focus points in mind as we wade through 2021:
☆ I want to focus on finishing my bachelor (undergraduate) at uni (that sounds so unbelievable and good and scary at the same time).
⭐︎ This year I want to create more moments that take me to the present and make me notice the little things. Cherish the little moments and love the people around me.
⭐︎ Write more little blogposts like these. Do let me know what types of post you love to read!
⭐︎ Do a workout two times a week, because you know it makes you happier.
⭐︎ Believe in myself. Know that even now you will and can. You are able. And trust your gut. That little feeling inside that just knows.
⭐︎ Stop biting the skin around my fingers. This has been such a problem (and a cause of shame) for me over the years and it takes time but I’m learning, I’m slowly learning.
⭐︎ Say yes to new and exciting things.
⭐︎ Romanticize everyday life a little more.
2021, we’re ready for you.
love, Eva ♡