i can barely remember september. it is as if the memory faded as quickly as it was made. i blame my brain. i blame the days that look alike, the life that was never more the same. i could blame the world, outside my room. but actually only i am to blame, for the barely remembered september.
i feel i’m a bit on the late side to write about last month, but i’ve just been feeling overwhelmed. and weird. and uninspired to write. but now i slowly feel some life flooding back into the part of my brain that loves blogging.
but looking back on september in this post, the memories start flooding back. i curse myself for not taking more pictures, for not making more memories, for not doing more. but i did the best i could. and the notes in my phone, the writings in my diary and the few pictures i took explain to me why it was harder this time. it was a month of emotional growth and of a new start at university. we just came back from vacation and the usual busier-than-it-seemed start of the semester made an appearance. i always underestimate the amount of work we have to do before the actual classes start. note to self: do not underestimate in future. but then again, will i have another start of a semester in the future? i have no clue what i will be doing next year. and somehow this soothes me as well as makes me want to panic and scream. i’ve also been doing a lot of that. screaming. on the inside.
according to the pictures, however, i’ve been spending my time making collages. which i discovered to be one of my favourite things to do nowadays. especially when i can use my pinterest archive of more than 10,000 pins. someone needs to stop me.
aside from my pinterest addiction, i officially started my new job. it is not the most exciting job, but a good sidejob for me. i can make my own plan and there is no one watching me all the time (which would always makes me nervous) and everyone is really kind. i’m glad i made the switch.
school-wise i have been incredibly busy. online classes are i think taking its toll, because its almost all i can do and think about. i find it so hard to take time off, but at the same time i’m not very productive when i don’t take time off. i’m also in the process of creating a research question for my bachelor thesis and this process has to happen very quickly. i just feel like i’ve been racing through everything in order to finish in time, but the thesis question also required a lot of thinking and rewriting, which makes you feel very unproductive. (the thesis question is also what the quote above is about, i want to research how film can provide information through film technique like camera movement and sound, rather than through dialogue.)
my little pimskie (my cat pip) was also present (on the top of my closet) during my many online classes.
in total i made one trip to “go to uni” and that wasn’t even to go to my actual university but to the eye collection museum in amsterdam. we met there with my thesis mentor and got the opportunity to read books from their exclusive collection on film. and of course i wore a fancy mask.
i also had a tiny victory car-driving wise. i don’t like driving alone, especially when i’m not very familiar with where i’m going. but i did drive by myself multiple times this month, so things are looking up for my future with cars!
and for the first time since the virus happened i babysat again! it was so good to see these two little ones again in what felt like, i quote the two kids in saying this, “a hundred years!”
i started a great book on the 22nd of september and want to recommend it to everyone!! you might have seen the film, but it’s called the guernsey literary and potato peel pie society and it’s so so so great. it consists entirely of letters from and to juliet, the protagonist, and her writing style is so witty. it also provides really insightful stories about the second world war on the channel islands.
and last but not least i would like to share with you my new obsession: loafers. these two icons on the images above (grace kelly and audrey hepburn) really pushed me over the edge and i bought a pair for myself! i unfortunately do not have pictures of me wearing them (yet), since i barely left the house and don’t actually need new footwear… but perhaps i could dedicate a post to them? (;
and a *virtual hug* to you all